Be Happy

Last night Sadie and I were chatting, and I asked, "Are we happy?" It was the end of a hard night and a hard week or two. It seemed that every night someone was throwing an intense tantrum, and we were getting stressed. During the week, a good chunk of the time I spend with the kids is during bedtime, and when so much of that time involves negative interactions, I found it hard feel happy.

We (Sadie) said a heart-felt prayer, just trying to figure things out. Are we doing something wrong? Both of us felt tired of analyzing (yes, the data-dad tires of analysis), and we felt we needed something different. Something other than talks about logical/natural consequences, other than structure/empowerment, something besides techniques and flow charts.

We felt we need more love, understanding, and forgiveness (of ourselves and the kids). We need to be teachers, not dictators. We need to be more aware of their needs and abilities. We need more heart, laughter, and effort to be positive.

I read a talk during nap time today by Sister Holland entitled, "Parenting: Everything to do with the Heart." I really like this quote she shared:

"Communication is not nearly as much a matter of skill as it is of attitude. When our attitude is one of broken-heartedness and humility, of love and interest in our children’s welfare, then that cultivates communication. Our children recognize that effort on our part. On the other hand, when we are impatient, hostile, or resentful, it doesn’t matter what words we choose or how we try to camouflage our feelings. That attitude will be felt by their discerning hearts."

Sadie and I decided to start with a clean slate. We decided to take advantage of the Atonement, and not carry the negative feelings of the past into the future. Sure, we'll have more bad days and weeks, but we can be happy today and celebrate that. And we have.